Mom Identity

It's strange to me that all the people I'm meeting in California only know me as a mom. I don't mean that I'm only a mother - it's just that they're getting to know me during this phase of life when being a mom is my primary identity. I still feel like an amateur parent quite often! And I've only been a mom for like 7% of my life at this point. I feel like I should introduce myself like this, "Hi, I'm Salmonista! I've moved around a lot and like making new friends. I probably used to be more interesting before I had kids. Now they're pretty much all I talk about. But I still have an independent identity buried in here somewhere! Let me just scrape off these soggy Cheerios and see if I can find it..."

So far, the majority of people I've befriended here are also parents, some with more years of experience than me. I suppose I'm viewing the people I meet through the lens of parenthood as well. We all have multiples factors that comprise our self-concepts; parenthood is one of many identity "hats" we wear. And yet, it's what we have in common.

Meanwhile, I'm starting to realize that I need opportunities to stretch my non-mom muscles from time to time. Back in Memphis, I had opportunities to press pause on the mom side of my brain when I was at choir practice or teaching English. As we get settled in to life in LA, I am on the lookout for ways I can engage in the world beyond the orbit of my two year olds. Don't get me wrong - I love my kids, and I usually am happy to spend time with them. But all day, every day just wears me out after awhile.