Sometimes when I'm out with the boys and we're having fun, I think to myself, oh, we should stop at a coffee shop and get a little treat. I imagine us all sitting around a table together, nibbling on something sweet, and having good conversations about life. Obviously, that last part should have clued me in because the boys are just now starting to string three words together ("Mommy help me," Gus said at lunch today when he wanted me to feed him Cheerios. Yes, Cheerios for lunch. We are in a major breakfast-for-every-meal phase over here lately.)
This morning, we were walking home from our weekly free entertainment at a nearby mall. We'd had a good time giggling and dancing at the puppet show, and the boys seemed to be in a good mood. So I thought, hey, let's stop at Starbucks! (I was also motivated by the fact that I hadn't finished my morning coffee at home...)
First, the boys were excited to look at the display board outside with all the flavors of hot chocolate. (They thought they were cookies.) Then, when we went in, they said, "Wow!" I guess they were impressed by their first visit to Starbucks! They quickly started grabbing armfuls of biscotti off the counter and running around the cafe. Using my best calm-yet-authoritative mother voice, I said, "Boys, come here and stand by me." They scampered over. Phew! As I ordered my latte, I returned the biscotti to their shelf and picked out more kid-friendly cookies, chocolate dipped madelines.
We took our treats outside (because it was 70 degrees, oh yeah, SoCal!) and sat around a table. They happily munched their cookies for about 2 minutes. I snapped some photos. Then the scene descended into CHAOS! Gus only ate the chocolate half of his cookie, then asked for more. Silly Mom, I had picked a package with three cookies. I told them they could share the last one. That was the WRONG ANSWER! They started screaming NO NO NO! as I broke the cookie and it came apart in four pieces. Huge tears! Gus reluctantly grabbed a piece with chocolate, but he wouldn't eat the plain parts. Gibson gobbled up the remaining 3/4 of the extra cookie, plus the original 1/2 that Gus refused to eat. So Gus was even MORE mad when he saw Gibson was still eating cookie while he had none.
The only other snacks I had with me were Goldfish crackers. The kids informed me that those were NOT an acceptable alternative. At this point I'd had maybe one sip of my coffee, but it was obviously time to go home. I told the boys to go get in the wagon. Gus jumped down from his seat saying "button!" I thought he was going to go play with the donate-your-change-to-help-the-homeless meter next to our table, so I said ok and turned my attention to helping Gibson wipe up. Next thing I know, Gus had run over to the crosswalk and was yelling "Button! Button!" because obviously that's what he was talking about. "Gus!" I yelled. "Get back here!" A pedestrian looked on and probably wondered if he should stop this two year old from crossing the street by himself.
I got Gibson down from the chair and ran to grab Gus. Of course, the wagon was around the corner of the store, so I had to retrieve it. Gibson came with me. Gus stood by the window pointing inside exclaiming "Cookie! More cookie!" I got them both in the wagon and started heading home. We'd gone about half a block when I heard some unhappy squeals behind me. I turned to see Gus laying on top of Gibson, possibly chewing on him, while they both were hanging over the side of the wagon. An older gentleman passing by helpfully pointed out, "Hey, they're going to fall out." I ignored him and said to the boys in a less-than-calm-and-quite-authoritative mother voice, "Cut it out!"
We managed to get home with all our limbs intact. Then I gave them popsicles to eat on the balcony (because I'm sure more sugar will solve their problems...) while I finished my latte in relative peace.
In conclusion, I think I'll wait on my little dream of hanging out at a coffee shop with my kids until they are, hmm, at least 5 years old. Or maybe younger if I just have one of them with me!
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